Look Out, Ang, There's a New Lee in Town.

Recently eaten: asparagus, tuna melt with havarti cheese
Recent annoyance: no tax refund this year

My parents were so thrilled by Ang Lee's Best Director Academy Award that I thought I might try my hand at directing a critically acclaimed motion picture. Here are some screenplay ideas I am kicking around based on Ang Lee's directing career and my own life:

1) Brokeass Mountain
Concept: Essentially it's a love story between the two main characters. Unfortunately, their love is in constant limbo because they are working for a nonprofit, living paycheck to paycheck, waiting for their crazy landlords to cash their fatty rent checks, and can't afford to see each other. Heartbreaking.

2) Crouching Tiger, Peeing Dragon
Concept: A buddy-cop movie. Tiger is the straight-laced, by-the-book, kung-fu master. Dragon is an unsuccessful recovering alcoholic, and Tiger's new partner, whose zany antics often infuriate Tiger, but in the end charm the uptight cop into an unlikely friendship. Heartwarming.

3) The Icing Storm
Concept: The local Krispy Kreme factory blows up spraying hot icing all over the town. At first, the local children delight in the sticky, sweet mess. But something sinister is going on when kids start disappearing one by one. Heart pounding.