Someone Must Have Gotten Raisins and Pennies Instead of Candy

Recently eaten: lean pocket
Recent annoyance: raggedy cuticle

Correct me if I'm wrong, but didn't the iron curtain come down already? Someone traded the head of the Moscow schools a bad box of Marlboroughs for his acid-washed jeans. They must be worried that Halloween will compete with Russia's national pasttime: getting wasted on vodka and then trying to figure out those little nested dolls.

Schools ban "cult of death" Halloween
Moscow schools have been ordered to ban students from celebrating Halloween despite the widespread popularity of the imported festival to Russia.

Halloween is being forced underground because it "includes religious elements, the cult of death, the mockery of death," a spokesman for the city's education department Alexander Gavrilov said Wednesday.

"It's not an attempt to block the celebration of this holiday completely, just in schools and colleges," he added.

Pumpkins and images of witches are widespread across Russia, with many bars organizing special fancy dress parties, despite the efforts of the Kremlin, and especially the Russian Orthodox Church, to curb enthusiasm for non-native festivities.

"This is destructive for the minds and the spiritual and moral health of pupils," said Gavrilov.