Wednesday, May 16, 2007


Recently eaten: corn chowder
Recent annoyance: it's so hard being a gangsta all the time

In the words of the great Nelly Furtado, "Maneater, wish you never met her all." I think this is a good idea to internalize " a little piece" of your loved one, literally. Don't forget that my funeral celebration blowout will include many gastronomical delights, some of which may be laced with a little bit o' me. Delish.

The Modern Man Eater Diet

Anthropophagy meets the health supplement movement with Modern Man Eater, a site that processes the corpses of your dearly departed into a wide variety of protein powders, vitamins, shakes and slurries!

Their FAQ is a hoot:

Q: Is this legal?

A: Well, lets put it this way: It is legal to have a dead body shipped anywhere in the world that you'd like. It is legal for us to do what we do in the country we do it in. Finally, the product we return to you is indistinguishable from similar agricultural or non-controled pharmaceautacal products, thus It is legal to be imported back to any country.

And this testimonial ought not to be ignored:

I've been bodybuilding since the seventies and, trust me, I'd put anything in my body to blast my quads. But I still couldn't add mass to my calfs. Since I've had the protein shakes from MME, I've been totally gunning my lats like never before, just gunning them!

Regretfully, all my relatives are still alive, so my fitness regimen still requires frequent nocturnal visits to the graveyard for my homemade protein powder.

Modern Man Eater Official Website

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