Friday, October 06, 2006

J.Yo Answers the Tough Questions In Life

Recently eaten: eggbeaters omelette, 2 giant scallops
Recent annoyance: Cirque du Soleil on Bravo. WTF? I just want to see reruns of Project Runway!

My roommate Jen is my svengali. "
Svengali is, in du Maurier's words, an "Oriental Israelite Hebrew Jew" with a cruel personality. He "would either fawn or bully, and could be grossly impertinent. He had a kind of cynical humour, which was more offensive than amusing, and always laughed at the wrong thing, at the wrong time, in the wrong place. And his laughter was always derisive and full of malice."

Okay, Jen is not actually an Oriental Israelite Hebrew Jew. Maybe the word I am looking for is guru.

ME: What if hamburgers could fly?
JEN: I would walk around with my mouth open all the time.

ME: If something can be extinct, can something just be stinct?
JEN: Is extinct like "out of the stinct?"

ME: The toilet is overflowing all over the floor!
JEN: Whelp, we're just going to have to move.

ME: What is a geoduct?
JEN: It's like a giant sea-penis.

ME: What is the movie Captain Ron about?
JEN: I don't know, but I like it when the kids tap on his glass eye while he's taking a nap.

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