Pour One Out For My Homie, Then Swab the Glass for DNA

Recently eaten: ravioli, meatballs, broccoli
Recent annoyance: abrasive waitstaff

Bereaved buy DNA pendants
"People hoping to remember deceased loved ones with something permanent can now have a piece of their DNA saved in a pendant.

Japanese company Eiwa Industry Co is selling pendants for preserving genetic mementoes of dead people. The DNA is taken from a strand of hair or piece of fingernail."

I know I'm not dead and gone yet, but I have plenty of fingernail clippings lying around for you all to remember me by. And, no, spitting on my casket as I go into the ground does not count as a DNA keepsake that I can treasure for all eternity.

More importantly, the pimp cup gets buried with me. Yeah!