Where Wolf? There, Wolf.
Recently eaten: steak burrito
Recent annoyance: false claims of blizzard-like conditions
This strange little guy is a lumberjack doll that transforms into a werewolf. This is a valuable educational tool for small children. Werewolves are everywhere in our midst in the 21st Century, but they have perfected their techniques for blending in with society. Even during a full moon, you might mistake one of them for a drunken frat boy.
- Lumberjacks are, almost without fail, werewolves.
- Lumberjacks are not only after the blood of the innocent, but they reduce vital forest areas that prevent soil erosion, and house endangered species.
- Anyone wearing those little capri pants to the knees is probably a werewolf.
- If a wolf head pops out of the stomach of someone in your vicinity, run for it, he's a werewolf!
- Beards only disguise thick wolf-like fur and any bloody entrails leftover from last night. Never date someone bearded.
- Consequently, Santa Clause, Bob Ross, Johnny Damon, and your grandfather were probably werewolves.
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