It's Not Me, It's You

Recently eaten: french bread pizza (5 cheese), peanut butter & chocolate ice cream sandwich
Recent annoyance: DC air quality

Dear Comcast,

This letter probably comes as no surprise to you. Things between us haven't been right for a while. So I'm leaving you. I thought I would try to tell you in person, but I can never reach you anymore. We never talk and that is one of the problems. I call and call, and all I get is that lousy touch-tone menu. When am I going to be option number one? I'm sick of being relegated to 'none of the above, dial 0 for the operator.' The worst part of it is that you send your friends to do your dirty work. When I need you, when I need something, you send one of your 'technicians'. I don't even get you in person. Did it ever occur to you that there's nothing wrong with my modem but that I just want to see you?

You seem awfully busy trying to find your next new thing, when you hardly bother to look at what's right under your nose. I've seen your television ads, trying to lure people with a first free month. That's just how they get the crack addicts. The first is for free and then when you can't live without your digital cable, you raise the price 300%! I won't be a part of your twisted scam. At first, I was attracted to your smoothness, your slick lines and highspeed internet. Now it's just a series of logjams and broken promises.

Goodbye, Comcast.